Sandwich Control and Pancake Land. We won Grismas this year. Better luck next year everybody.

I think that this pretty much sums up Grismas Round 1:

This is Roy Orbison's sister, Joy the Dental Hygienist.

I did manage to walk away from Round 1 with a stuffed belly and a set of porcelain ramekins.

During Grismas Round 2, Pancake Land beat me, just barely, but I walked away with a wheel barrow full of goodies. The best part was the pranks that we managed to pull off. Especially the one on G-Man.

A few days before Grismas, G-Man had tossed one of his presnents across the room in a joking display of Grismas apathy. Big mistake. The next day Pancake Land and I switched his actual gift, a football autographed by Ryan Mallett, with a $5 coffee mug that has a painstakingly forged autograph by Felix Jones, that I had smashed with a hammer. The trick was to make G-Man think that he had smashed his Grismas presnent when he had chunked it across the room. He would open the presnent, feel terrible about it, and then be blown away when we presented him with the real presnent. The look on his face when I told him the smashed cup was signed by Felix Jones was priceless:

Devastated!

Needless to say, he was blown away by the real gift.

Relief!

He then began to cry a little bit. He was very moved by the trickery and the thoughtfulness of the presnent. I’m sure the half gallon of eggnog didn’t help either. After regaining his composure, I got our proud patriarch to pose with his new toy.

Go long.

The hijinks continued on throughout the night and concluded with P.L. and I opening our new 32 inch (81.28cm) flat screen television. We had suspected that is was a television, but we really though it was the treadmill we have been wanting. It is now hooked up in our living area with the new Roku box I got for P.L. so she can watch her Netflix queue full of documentaries and romantic suspense flicks.

After Round 3, I took stock of my haul and was very pleased. I managed to score (in no particular order): a Chef’s coat emblazoned with the Top Chef logo followed promptly by my birth name (which is not Sandwich Control), the Top Chef bistro apron and original cookbook, Wichcraft by Tom Colicchio, the LP and CD of Glitter and Doom, Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks for DS, books galore, a button press, salt and pepper mills, an Eggsact egg timer, a Camelbak, a computer for my trike, black high-top Chucks and a pair of shoes to destroy at work, a titanium spork, two new hoodies, A Sweater!, a work coat, a Disgusting Science kit, a new Down comforter, new linens, vintage rugged outdoorsman gear, a few gifts cards, and a ton of other stuff that I can’t think of off of the top of my head. Of course, let us not forget this shining jewel:

Strike first. Strike hard. No mercy.

If Miyagi Do Karate had t-shirts, I would have one of those as well.

Well, tonight is the 9th Annual Playaz ball. The theme this year is “The Last Party on Earth”. Taco Planet wanted to keep the theme pretty open ended so as to ensure the maximum number of costumed attendees as possible. I have a feeling there will be a wide array of craziness there. Well, there always is. The upside to the craziness is getting to see the ol’ crew again. Dark Wombat and his friend Jimmy the Roo are in from Japan, Don Chulius and the Countess Ida von Blitzenstein are in from our Nation’s capital, the Heat should be in from OKC, and only the good Lord knows who else will sneak into town for this shindig. My S.A.N.D. brothers should be there, as well as most of the in-town crew. This should be a good time. I hope Taco Planet salted the driveway. Otherwise, ain’t nobody makin’ it up that hill.

Well, I’ve got to go prepare my outfit and do a lot of nothin’ before I pick up Dark Wombat and Jimmy the Roo for the traditional Pre-Playaz Ball Hardee’s feast. I’m sure you’ll hear all about it tomorrow morning. More soon. ~SC