Did She Just Give Birth To A Middle-Aged Black Woman?


June 10, 2010 by sandwichcontrol

First off the bat this morning, I would like to wish Zaxxon a Happy Birthday. Make sure you wish him one as well.

Next, I have a my very first Summer school chemistry test, ever, this morning. Am I nervous? Not really. Should I be? Probably. The whole test is taken using a clicker. No scantron and pencil. Just my buzzer. That part freaks me out more than the “How many atoms of hydrogen are in a 0.68mol sample of actetate?” part of the test. I can do the math, well I think I can, but placing technology in between me and the teacher, as far as the giving and receiving information goes, freaks me out. I already have a deep respect for/ fear of technology. It is bad enough that you can’t have a conversation with someone you haven’t seen in more than a year without being asked if you have a “Facebook” or a “Twitter”. People just assume that everyone text messages, so they don’t bother asking that. I find it quite amusing that people seem to be slightly offended that they have to actually interact with me by speaking to me via a tiny piece of plastic rather being able to type a code for words onto tiny buttons loacted on said tiny plastic machine, at me.

Whoa. I didn’t mean to go off on technology like that. The answer to the question is: yes I am a little nervous about this test. I’ve learned to just call it test anxiety. That way if I bomb it, I can say “I have test anxiety, so I don’t really take tests that well.” I lure them into feeling sorry for me and then I steal their wallet.

This is weird. I feel all snarky and roguish. Like I should be talking in the Batman voice and not taking any lip off of an old lady. The only the thing that is different today than it was yesterday, is that I got my babies back. My Chacos came back to their rightful owner, repaired and, apparently, filled with a double-dose of badass. It is the strangest thing.

My trip to the land of Furious/Mick was delayed again because of a pain-pill induced sleepiness on Furious Jessy’s part. I think we can all agree that it is better for her to heal up and feel better than for me to get my website. Plus, it gave me the opportunity to watch more of the ridiculously terrible shit that is Angel season 5. I am only going to say this once and you let me know if it makes sense. Okay?

Two vampires have sex and conceive a child (unheard of!). That child is stolen by a vengeance-seeking vampire hunter, who accidentally gets sucked into a hell dimension with the child. They are in the hell dimension for 3 months, Earth time, wherein 18years has passed in the hell dimension. The child returns to Earth as an 18 year old demon hunter, only to sleep with the love interest of his father(vampire), a woman turned part demon turned demigod turned back to part human/part (?) and therefore conceive a child with her. In the process of all of this craziness, somehow we overlooked the fact that said love interest/baby mama has returned to Earth from the heavens as a villain and needs to have the blood of a virgin to protect the baby and actually induce its birthing. Out pops baby AntiChrist and voila! the baby is a middle aged black woman who reminds me of Toni Braxton for some unknown reason. At this point, I did not question the fact that she reminded me of Toni Braxton. Plus, it would mean admitting that I know who Toni Braxton is, which is weird enough for me anyway.

Well, there you have it. Season 5 of Angel, well, almost all of it. There are still 4 or 5 episodes left. Hopefully, Cordy will die a terrible death and Spike will show up pretty soon. Enough of this queerness. Wish me luck on my test. More soon. ~SC


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