A Treatise on Texting.


January 4, 2011 by sandwichcontrol

Q: Do you know the name of the color, of Crayon, that is designed specifically for drawing on faces?

A: Punch.

It is right there on the wrapper.

The next person who tries to “convince” me that I need to get text messaging on my phone, gets their face drawn on by the Punch-colored Crayon. Why is it so important that I have text messaging? So that you can send me messages in some made-up acronym language (that I don’t speak) because calling me to ask me a simple question is such a friggin’ hassle? Jeez. Am I that bad to talk to on the phone? Or, are you just lazy? I am thinking it is the latter.

So, I have come up with a solution. I call it “Voice Messaging”. It is quite simple, really. Here’s how it will work. First, you’ll call me. I know, I know, you don’t want to call me, that’s the whole point. Just, bear with me here. You call me, and when I answer, you say the code word. By saying the code word I know that this is a voice message and not a conversation. I will acknowledge the code word, giving you the green light to go ahead with the message. Once all of the information has been exchanged, you simply say “thanks” and hang up. No “goodbyes”. No “talk to you later”. Just “thanks”.

Here is a sample voice message (so that you can pick up what I’m throwing down):

(buzz, buzz, buzz)

SC: Hello.

You: Swordfish.

SC: Righty-o!

You: What time are you coming over?

SC: A little before 7.

You: Thanks.


Isn’t that easy? And it actually takes less time and energy than typing on ridiculously tiny keypads. So, there’s my solution to your problem with me not having text messaging.

Moving on.

Do you know what’s awesome? Kevin Bacon. What’s better than Kevin Bacon? How about Kevin Bacon playing Kevin Bacon’s biggest fan:

Q: How brilliant is that?

A: Pretty friggin’ brilliant.

So, I got the 2010 Daily Photo galleries all combined into one giant gallery last night. The images still need to be captioned, so please be patient while I label each one of them individually by hand.

Today is work in the studio this morning and work in the letterpress shop this afternoon. I’ve got to get the shop ready for classes. They start on Monday. Already? Jeez, this break flew by. Anyway, I’m triking today, so I’d better go get ready for it. Ride hard. More soon. ~SC

1 comment »

  1. Word to Me says:

    I <3 Kevin Bacon…Just sayin…

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