The Chewy Center.


February 10, 2015 by sandwichcontrol

Of Science.

Before we get started talking about Science, I want you to notice that the Store is officially open for business! Go there. Buy things.

Now, on to the world of Science!

First, let’s have a little refresher for those of who haven’t seen the scientific method since 7th grade.

The first step in the scientific method is observation. Look at things. Think about things.

Once you’ve done that, do a little research and then form a testable hypothesis.

Test your hypothesis using repeatable experiments.

Record, collect, and analyze the data from your experiment.

Draw conclusions based on your data and tell others about it. If the idea is sound enough, others will try your experiment and attempt to prove you wrong. Because they don’t like you. No one does.

Okay, now that we are all caught back up, let’s talk about marshmallows.

Marshmallows, like you use to make s’mores, are just air whipped into sugar and gelatin. It has fuck-all to do with an actual marsh mallow. I’m sure back in the day there was some ancient treat made with the roots of the plant, but not today. And not the kind of marshmallows we are working with.

So, here’s my application of the scientific method as it pertains to marshmallows.

I got some “dehydrated marshmallows” the other day at Brick City Emporium.


I ate some of them. (They are delicious.) I looked at them. I thought about them. And I formed the hypothesis that I could make them.

I skipped that whole “research” stage because I thought “How hard could it be to dehydrate marshmallows?”. I have a dehydrator. Marshmallows are readily available at any supermarket. Piece of cake.

So, I got the dehydrator out. I picked up two different kinds of marshmallows: fruity flavor shapes and regular style. I then loaded them into the dehydrator. My first indicator that things were weird was when the normal marshmallows were too thick to have a tray stacked on top of them. Anyway, I loaded it up and set it to drying.


After 24 hours, they were still mostly soft and hadn’t shrunk at all. Because they are supposed to shrink down into tiny little crunchy Lucky Charms marshmallows, right? 36 hours in and still no shrinking, but they are definitely harder.

After a total of 72+ hours I ended the experiment. The regular marshmallows just got crusty on the outside but were still gummy on the inside. When you tried to eat one though, it became instantly like an old piece of chewing gum. As if you scraped it off of the bottom of a diner booth and put it in your mouth.

So, those were chunked.

The fruit ones are okay. It you really like the ones in children’s breakfast cereals and want to eat giant ones, then boy do I have a deal for you. Especially if you like having giant sugar crunchies stuck in your teeth.

They didn’t shrink. They actually kind of puffed up.



It turns out that most commercially made marshmallows have things like xantham gum in them to prevent them from drying out. (This is why we research things.) For best results when dehydrating marshmallows, the innernet suggests you make your own marshmallows and then dehydrate them.

As to my conclusion, I think I’ll just stick to buying the tubs of dehydrated marshmallows from a reputable vendor.

And that’s the Science report I’ve been promising you.

As to yesterday. Well, as I’ve already stated, I’m not good at dehydrating. Except myself, apparently. I know for a fact that I didn’t drink enough water over the weekend and I suffered for it most of the day. Needless to say I spent the day drinking water. And peeing a lot.

Once the water started flowing through my veins again, I was able to get some work done. I ran out to Teacher Sis’s school to help out with the last Nerd Club meeting of the year.

I also worked in my studio quite a bit. I got more button images cut out. I got the rust cleaned off of my press. I got type set for a new postcard.

I went to my actual job.

And the new logo stickers showed up!

Logo Stickers

Rumor has it that there is a t-shirt out there in the universe somewhere with this logo on it. Hopefully it is soft and comfy.

Okay, on to today.

I have double workout this morning. Then, breakfast and studio work. I am going to attempt to print a new card. We shall see.

Speaking of seeing…

See ya’ tomorrow.

More soon. ~SC

1 comment »

  1. La Duchess says:

    Love you.

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