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“Don’t Mess With That Chick, She Knows Knife Hand.”

09/16/11

I fell asleep at some point in the night. God only knows how much I actually slept. Apparently this festival went from Jerrytown to frat party overnight. Wave after wave of beer-swilling 18-25 year old dudes keeps showing up. There was more whooping than the night before and now somebody keeps yelling “Stella!” for some insane reason. At some point, some guy felt the need to inform everyone in the entire campgrounds that “Bluegrass festivals are not about boyfriends and girlfriends. They are about having a good time.” I’m sure that he just assumed that bluegrass, the music itself, was a given at Bluegrass festivals.

I woke up to the sound of the “poo truck” coming to clean and empty the port-o-potties. Nothing like quite like the smell of heavy chemicals and human shit first thing in the morning. Breakfast anyone? Who’s hungry?

When I actually emerged from the tent and joined my fellow comfortably shod campers they asked how I slept. I lied. “Like a rock.” I said. “Hit the sack after the show intending to rest a little while and woke up to the poo truck.” Can’t let the hippies smell weakness. Can’t let them know that their “whoo-hooing” at 4:30am woke me up. Must stay strong. Need coffee to refill the bitter tank. Need Metal to harden my heart.

11:15am

At the show. Arrived earlier to find that one of our light tracks had fallen in the night. It took out a couple of mugs, a small bowl, and a whole stack of butter trays. Job security. The drumming and drone of stick chanting from my neighbors has been pretty constant since the show started today. Ugh.

It is cold and raining still. There is no sunlight in Jerrytown this time of year. I feel like Morgan Freeman in Robin Hood: Prince of Theives.

Let’s talk about girls for a second. To put it delicately, I’ll quote the eloquent Owen Wilson ala Shanghai Knights. This place is ass soup, a lot of pretty girls in Granolaville. The only problem is that they all are either pushing a double stroller with an additional kid strapped to their chest, holding hands with their significant other (boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, etc.), or they’re with their parents. Not that they’re all in high school or anything. It just takes way more effort to sort out the 14 year olds from the 25 year olds these days. Scary actually. Hormone filled meat is the devil. That and hoochie clothing. Not that I’m really looking or anything. Just making a Scientific observation. I’m so supercharged with loathing right now, it’s take a helluva lot of work on some chick’s part to get very much of my attention. Gimme your husband’s money and get the hell out of my booth. Only 5 more hours to go today. 6 down, 5 to go.

9:43pm

Back at camp. Worn out from makin’ that money. More tomorrow. ~SC

09/17/11

At some point in the night, I woke up to a couple of Cajuns playing banjo in our camp. And talking about the government. A little too heavy for the middle of the night for me. I had to put my headphones back in and have Metallica lull me back to sleep.

I woke up again at 8-something to more rain pitter-pattering on my tent. Then it started raining for real. It was finally done with this foreplay drizzle nonsense. Somebody had called down the thunder and they were about to get it. Unfortunately, I had decided to wait to go pee until the rain let up. But, rather than letting up, it started to storm and did so for the next 2 hours. Before I ponchoed up and departed my tent, I stacked everything on my sleeping mats and placed the whole thing in the center of the tent. An island of my belongings. As much as I love my tent and always speak highly of it, it was no match for the onslaught of the rain and we were starting to become a little moist around the edges. Somebody start up the bilge pump, she’s takin’ on water. Poor fella’. God only knows what I’ll find when I get back to camp tonight.

I was so down because of the rain that I did a drastic thing. I sought out the one man who could dispense a little comfort to me. No, not the bartender. The haberdasher. And I got myself the derby that I’ve been threatening to buy for a few years now. I figure I haven’t bought anything else this trip, so why not? And it totally rocks. You’ll see soon enough why I’ve been wanting one. It just suits me. To a tee. You are going to be so jealous.

The weather finally cleared up. It is warm and sunny for the first time since we arrived.

Oh, I spoke too soon. Now it is clouding up again. What’s that you say? We’re under a tornado watch until 11pm?! Awesome. At least my booth is located in the evacuation shelter.

6:50pm

Tornado watch in full effect. The place is starting to get crowded. People are filing in and waiting. Waiting for shit to get real. Luckily, the worst has past us by. Other than a little rain from a yellow sky and an amazing lightning display, we passed the rest on to somebody else. The show went on, as they say.

Back at camp.

When we got back to “comfortable shoes” the crew had huddled into the mess hall for an old fashioned family sing-a-long. I listened for a while, but it’s off to bed for me. I’m happy to report that neither was my tent blown away, nor was it flooded. Everything was bone dry thanks mostly to luck and my cushion island in the middle of the tent. Anywho, my Coney Island baby is calling me off to dreamland. More soon. ~SC

09/18/11

I was so exhausted last night that I woke up still lying on my back. I normally roll onto my side right before I fall asleep. That’s just how tired I was. Before I lost consciousness, a huge group of girls somewhere was belting out “Livin’ on a prayer”.

This morning it is sunny and warm. It’s the first day that I can wear shorts and sandals since Wednesday. It’ll probably get chilly again this evening, but I’ll burn that bridge when I get to it.

At some point my notebook broke apart. I’ll have to repair it when I get home.

Sorry, I’m a little scatterbrained this morning. Coffee just got here. Le Duke dropped it off on his way to pick up biscuits and gravy for us. I FUCKING LO-O-O-O-O-OVE biscuits and gravy. And what’s that? Fried potatoes and onions with smoked sausages?! Awesome!

Holy crap! It’s bedtime already. Today has been a busy day. I haven’t had a chance to write since breakfast. We finished the show out as expected, with a drizzle of customers. We broke down the booth and went through the whole frustrating game of Tetris that is repacking the van. I ended up having to almost empty the van out completely and start from scratch.

That done we come back to a nearly empty campgrounds. It is like a ghost town compared to what was here this morning. After a brief rest, we headed off to dinner. After the summit burger chow down, we headed back to camp for a little hang time with Kodiak Kate and Grizzly Dave’s family. They’re the last other members of “comfortable shoes” remaining here and it is only appropriate that it is just us left because they are the ones that turned Le Duke onto this show to begin with.

Camp is a little creepy now. I feel a little exposed. I guess compared to yesterday when I was surrounded by tents and RVs, now I am out in the open. It’s weird. It feels like most of the good people left today. And most of the people that are left just don’t want to go back to their shitty lives. They just can’t let the party die. Granted the whooping and fireworks are fewer and far between. Regardless, Grizzly Dave gave me some blessed earplugs. Better late than never. Anyways, that said, it’s bedtime. It’s late and I’ve got a ridiculously long day tomorrow. 4.5 hours of driving, then 2 hours of tutoring. And an article to write. Plus, I’ve got to get to work on the Winfield mega post. Maybe I’ll take Tuesday off. Yeah, right. Anyways, more soon. ~SC

This concludes our Winfield adventure. We are all caught up. I do regret it a little that I didn’t get more photos. I only really got a good one of this dragonfly that was outside my tent one morning.

Anywho, that’s it. More stuff tomorrow morning. ~SC