Oh Child, If You Only Knew.


January 1, 2014 by sandwichcontrol

What your teachers do at night, it would make you like school so much better.

Happy New Year!

Or whatever.

Last night I rang in the new year playing Cards Against Humanity with a collection of nerds and middle school teachers. Which group is more fucked up? The teachers, of course. It’s not their fault. You made them this way. All of you.

Oh, and the party was Very Metal.

A Very Metal New Year.

A Very Metal New Year.

Today is a day of presnents. Not for me, but for you. I mean, I deserve presnents, but I get them all the time. I think you deserve something nice every once in a while. That’s why I found you this video.

Didn’t get enough of the original Star Trek series? Always wanted to see Grant Imahara play Hikaru Sulu? Then, this is for you:

Also, Teacher Sis sent me this crazy thing. It involves a guy and beads. No, not like that. Different kind of beads. You and your mind. Gutters for life. sigh.

Pretty rad, right?

You want me to blow your mind with another fun bit of trivia? Okay. Today marks five years of Daily Photos. I have been taking a photo of myself everyday for five years. That’s 1826.21 days in a row of me doing something that isn’t hard wired into my brain. I have missed days of eating or sleeping or brushing my teeth or showering, but I took a photo of myself that day.

I know it seems silly to you. I take photos of myself. It is silly. But the point of this experiment wasn’t vanity or narcissism, it was an attempt to make me take photos. I have to have a camera on me all of the time. That way, there’s no excuse for not taking photos. If I can’t spare a few minutes of my busy day of watching stupid television shows or eating super nachos for art, then I don’t deserve to think of myself as a contributor to art. I’d just be some guy who likes to doodle or take snapshots. There’s nothing wrong with that. The only thing is, I’d be letting the 8 year-old version of myself down. The only other profession that I’ve ever said I wanted to be when I grow up, other than a garbage man, is an artist. I’ve said it since I was a wee lad. And I’m sticking to my guns on it.

You may call the whole thing silly and dismiss it. But I did it. And I am continuing to do it. What have you done everyday for the past five years? Yeah. That’s what I thought.

Shit got real there for a second. Whoa!

Anyways, it’s new year’s. I’m off to sit around eating potato soup and watch some dumb television. Have a great start of your year!

See ya’ tomorrow.

More soon. ~SC

1 comment »

  1. Dave says:

    I can honestly say, that for the past five years, I have masturbated, at least once a day, to this website. Keep taking photos stupid.

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