Accidental Spoonerisms.*


July 27, 2010 by sandwichcontrol

I can say, without a doubt, that yesterday I got dirtier than I have in a very long time. The sweat under my watch band came running down my hand in muddy streaks. You know when you’ve been working on stuff around the house and then you wash your hands and the soap kind of drips off in dirty drops all over the white of the sink? Imagine that on whole body scale. The tub was just covered in schmutz. It just poured off of me. Not to mention the smell. If any one ever asks me what tearing a cedar shake roof off of a gazebo in the middle of a jungle is like, I now have an answer: Dirty. The yard in which we are doing all of this work is beautiful. It is like a zen garden/ jungle bungalow/ hiking trail. Part of me wants a backyard like. The other half of me remembers being up on a roof being eaten alive by swarm after swarm of mosquitoes. Tropical rainforest in my backyard? I’ll pass.

My hand still hurts. I think I hurt it sledge hammering. I was talking to Taco Planet about it and he said that his hand was kind of busted as well from all of that justice we reigned down on that brick wall. Anyway, I’ve been soaking it in an aqueous solution of magnesium sulfate (Epsom salt in hot water) and that helps for a while, but it ends up hurting again. It didn’t bother me last night while I slept. Sunday night it had me tossing and turning. Maybe it didn’t bother me because I rubbed some Mentholatum on it. It seemed to help a little. What I need is some Tiger Balm.

So, according to the current plans, which may change at a moments notice, me, Pancake Land, and White Chocolate are going to Colorado this weekend to go white water rafting for Pancake Land’s 30th birthday. Let me clarify, really quickly. I am not getting near any rapids. They are going on the raft and I am staying in town to wander about taking photos. The plan is to road trip up there, raft Friday and Saturday, and then cut down to the Grand Canyon, and then cut back across to home. Seven states in four days. It will definitely be an adventure. P.L. has had the road trip jones for a while now, and seeing as how the rest of the birthday plans fell apart, this trip seems like an excellent idea. There is a slight chance that there will skydiving at some point during this trip as well. If this happens, then I am definitely doing that part.

See, I am not a water person. At all. I don’t even like sitting in the bath tub. So the idea of being in water and running the risk of potentially being smashed upon a rock which would be quickly be followed by my drowning, doesn’t sound like a good time to me. Whereas, jumping out of an airplane with a person strapped to my back, falling thousands of feet, and then smashing to the Earth at hundreds of kilometers per hour, I have no problem  with. Perhaps it is that whole I get to fly for a while before I crash. I mean, as a child, Hell, as a grown up I have dreamed about flying. The chance to do that, even if it is quickly followed by my smashing face first into the ground, is so worth it. Never once in my life have I been like “You know what would be awesome? Being in a inflatable raft hurling down a body of fast moving water over incredibly rocky terrain.” Never said it. Not even in my sleep.

Anyway, I am telling you all of this because, there is a chance that I will not have my lappy with me, so therefore no post. I am just telling you so that you can prepare yourself for a weekend without me. It will be hard, but I think you can make it. I’ll take notes and report in whenever we get back.

Anyway, I’m off to rock out some more bamboo flooring. More soon. ~SC

* click here for an explanation.


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